Wine Reviews for Lovers of Japanese Verse

Santa Rita Hills fog

The Wine Bored continues to search for more satisfying wine reviews. Flowery notes that reference obscure exotic fruit make us squirm or giggle. Even worse are reviews that elevate elevator music. Makes us want to drink vodka. But we love wine, still find it pretty fascinating. We love the new ‘Bu winemaking crew. If only we could come up with a new language for discussing wine. We float a couple ideas below.

2003 Babcock Cargasacchi Pinot Noir $32 (on release): Tasted numerous times over five years. I think we know this wine pretty well. 13.6%

Years hidden in fog.
More tease than right wing party.
Pinot triumphant.

1977 Grahams Port ~$190: Last bottle from mixed case of same vintage. 20%

Forgotten icon.
Can still be had for a song.
Elvis Sinatra…

The haiku form is difficult to attempt much less master, but it is also so much fun to try. We feel the promise is there for a new and immediately more satisfying wine review form. I cannot think of any reason not to try why limericks or sonnets as well.

How about less structured reviews? Scatalogical. Bukowski, Ornette Coleman. Improvised…although nothing really ever is. In the vernacular of the modern era…spoken word. Here we go.

2006 Thomas Dundee Hills Pinot Noir $50: Not sure what to make of this. Like when somebody pops out of their car after hanging up their handicap sticker and the only handicap you can imagine they have is thirds on dessert. Are we offended? Do we care? Does it matter? 13.6%

2009 Malibu Sanity Chardonnay $32: Our favorite winemaker Jim Moore liked this wine comparing it to lemon chiffon. tBoWkowski sez…I was thinking of the Parisian Room on Pico and Western. It’s a post office now but it used to be a locals only scene for sisters and brothers. Joe Tex played his last healthy LA gig there returning 90 days later on his deathbed. Show me a wine that’s got a good maker…show me! 14.6%

Here go Joe!


  1. Wavatar
    doctore says:

    Wine. Scant glimpse of connection to earth and sky dissolves like wife’s logic.

  2. Wavatar
    Ron In Saudi Arabia says:

    Wine Sage,

    Please tell us about wines from other parts of the world like Turkey, Greece, and Portugal. I am living away and can sometimes access these wines, but not those I am miss like Rhone Valley blends and luscious California Cabs.

  3. Wavatar
    igty says:

    i think iambic pentameter may be a superior choice for you.
    sonnets don’t work in haiku, so you’re compelled to be sharply clever–it’s unbecoming. and why don’t you stick to wines less than 20 bucks!!!!
    you’re a deviate even on your wine forum.

  4. Wavatar
    Jim Ruxin says:

    [posted by tBoW on behalf of Mr. Ruxin] Your site caught me eye and ear. Wine people are usually so boring… when I have a taste of the grape, I prefer to talk about issues and ideas, and it seems the finer the wine the more right wing the opinions.

    What a dilemma!

    Who are you? The haikus aren’t very good, but at least you know what they are.

    How’s this?”

    Sarah Palin sucks dead rats
    like ancient ideas,
    Bacchus pursues beauty, understanding.

Got something to add?