Posts belonging to Category Literature



Chilled Bubbly is Perfect for Summer…Let’s Drink Some Real Soon!!

THE DARK LORD FINDS HIMSELF IN A LIME-LIKE POOL; DUNHILL IN A TOOTHY DEATH GRIP

When Did the Rules Change For Sparkling Wines?!? Is this some New Wine Gonzo?

Normally a post touting summer chilled sparkling wine would feature Prosecco; that frothy sweet little wine with low alcohol [ed. under 10%], tastes like peaches and mixes with anything. Guzzle an ice-chilled bottle, height of summer seated at a restaurant courtyard in Sevilla getting ready to tour the cathedral with its impoverished tesoro room. Today? Champagne style cava. Pink sparklers from Bordeaux. And a U20 sweepstakes runner from Mendocino? Man…that’s the way you do it. Money for nothin’…bubbles for free.

Things seem to have changed. We tasted three sparkling wines recently that suggest a sparkler trend with which we are not familiar. We are hardly the first to say this BBBUUUTTT Cava sparklers have come a long way! In fact the old rules that governed the commission of sparkling wines have been upended; notice we MUST NOT say champagne as that it is a total winespeak faux pas. Try any of the following without fear.

Sharffenberger Brut Rose Excellence “Suggested retail $26” but can be found for half that at World Market. Non-vintage approximately half and half Chard and Pinot Noir from the Anderson Valley. Muscular. Top heavy. Very pleasing. Could suck this down all day at…maybe…a wedding? Great news! Buy it at World Market at half price!

Calvet Cremant de Bordeaux Brut Rose 2015 U20 at $17 or less, almost 100% Cab Franc. Come on. That’s impressive. I guess the old rules are officially thrown out. Balanced, Seductive. On the red side of pink. Tougher to find than a collusion conviction.

Raventos i Blanc Blanc de Blancs U20 at ~$20: YUMMY JUMMY NUMMY NUM NUMS! Cava sparkler perfectly balanced, good weight golden apples sez Mrs tBoW. We could say poor mans Krug but that would be quite a stretch. Or would it? Great backstory here worth reading how this Penedes winery stepped it up champagne style in 2012. Sold to tBoW by Katie of Desert Wine Shop [ed. now there’s a surprise.]

Hunter S. Thompson is an iconic symbol of the Baby Boomers. He blew his brains out.  People do that when facing mortality. Just sayin’ [ed. so did Anthony Bourdain]. Thompson (and Bourdain) was not old enough to do that. He did practice excessive habits which certainly contributed to his impulse control. And he loved guns. We have two videos about the Dark Lord. He merits that. Look at this embedded video about his unimaginable daily intake of substances. Then open the vid below in which “kindred” authors and film people reference Thompson’s works. Ask yourself this. Was this any way to live?

Murder, Spies, the News Cycle and Tasting Wines

We understand many people drink wine to avoid the news cycle. Not tBoW. We find tasting wine complements the disorder of politics.

We share our definitive guide to recent White House literature so our readers can decide which of these worthy books will go best with their choice of wines. [ed. tBoW uses “news cycle” but he means the President. We would prefer to avoid being cyber-bombed by the Russians.] Each book will be turned into a movie so you could also wait a bissel.

The White House reality show is not really funny [ed. Mr. Story: Oh no.] For now. In fact it is chilling…like a nice bottle of sparkling wine on a summer evening [ed. Mr. Story: A copper cube in a cryostat at zero kelvin is more scientifically accurate.] Things will definitely get very ugly shortly. The US and our allies continue to be undermined from across the Volga. Democratic European countries are under assault by right wing fascist nationalists – Marine Lepin – and eastern bloc neo-Nazis in Bulgaria.

tBoW has read a handful of books about the “hybrid war” that helped elect the Big Cheeto. This “hybrid war” continues to undermine democratic nations who have long been friends and allies. Russian money, loyalists and hackers lead the charge under Putin and his Oligarchs.

The Plot to Destroy Democracy by Malcolm Nance, published June 2018 is a freaking espionage dissertation. The message is Putin has deployed cyberwarfare and limited on-the-ground warfare to disrupt NATO, the EU and US elections. This blended attack – arms, tanks and Facebook – caught most Western political groups with their pants down. tBoW recommends an extra dry martini made with Sardinian Wild Vodka [ed. tBoW says shake 75 times] in order to properly process Nance who worked as a code breaker for the US Navy. Message? We are losing. Putin is winning. Trump and crew are Russian assets[ed. Mr. Story: We must consider diversifying our assets and launch a new blog for this growing market- The Best of Vodkas.]

Fear by Robert Woodward, early 2018. Superbly documented and sourced (although very few sources are named) to reveal how chaotic is the White House and it’s main occupant. We learned what is a “deep source.” Of course when the only two people in the room are Trump and Bannon it is pretty easy to guess who told Bob what went on. Message? Trump is a liar. That’s a repeated quote from Woodward and his “deep sources.” Read Woodward with a crisp Rosaro Negroamero Rosé from Puglia.

Putin’s Labyrinth by Steve Levine, published 2008. Absolutely chilling. The murder of former KG/FSBB officer Litvinenko who turned against Vlad P. He was poisoned in London – Litvinenko was – with some radioactive drops by a former FSB colleague. Painful death. Russian spies prefer using radioactive poison. Use your imagination why. Message? Putin and the FSB are ruthless killers. Try a mojito with Club Havana 3 y.o. “ron”.

Red Notice by Bill Broward, published 2009. Obviously written by a “helping pro” in the “thriller” style. Bottom line: Broward figured he could make billions in Russia when the Soviet Union fell apart in the early 90s. Broward bought “citizens’ shares” of industries that were no longer publicly owned. The Putin-led oligarchs ran Broward out of town. Broward’s Russian lawyer Magnitsky stayed, was tortured and murdered. Broward lobbied for the Magnitsky Act which impounded billions of oligarch money stashed in Western banks. The White House is working tirelessly to dismantle the Magnitsky Act and free billions of locked down Oligarch cash. Message: Capitalism cuts many ways. A zesty briny Albariño from Rías Baixas will give you strength. Finish the bottle.

The Apprentice by Greg Miller, published 2018. If Woodward is all about Bannon, Tillerson and “the 2017 Oval Office gang” then Miller is all about Flynn, Carter Page, Papadopoulis, Manafort, Assange and Roger Stone. Miller is the WaPo beat writer on cyber warfare. He details how the Russian hackgroup, the Internet Research Agency, worked Facebook, Yahoo, Google and hundreds of online “news houses” to whip the alt-right and radical left into a frenzy. Trump won with fewer votes than Romney who lost. Message: Cyber warfare rules, these guys are all “assets.” Woodland Hills Wine Company has a $16 Prosecco Loredan Gasparini Asolo Superiore that will keep you turning pages and shaking your head.

Malcolm Nance explains how hybrid warfare works.

Glass Jar Goes Home – Your Home – for the Holidays.

The Holidays are over. But for one tBoW reporter the Holidays are just eleven short months away.

Is eleven months sufficient time to find a new line of beeswax? What will the future bring for the Reluctant Millennial.

The Glass Jar did not have time to wish all tBoW readers a happy holiday. You see, after my slap in the face from the pizzeria, I had to find a new calling. It was time for something far from the pizza crowd to help stay the horrible memories. There was blue wave work in Clarksville, TN where a Yankee is welcome in any waffle house should he dare set foot. My days working for the Democrats were long and often grueling. However, working on a campaign in the south was worth it. The payoff was not our candidate’s victory. He got crushed. The 250+ phone calls personally made along with endless doors knocked on were worth it. I felt qualified for my next gig; putting packages on doorsteps [ed. Mr. Story: Some of the packages delivered by the Glass Jar must have been the gifts I recommended for wine lovers in my December post.]

I was ready to walk into UPS for a job interview to see if I was qualified. Like a field organizer trusted to organize Democrats in Trump country, the pressure was on. It was time to see if I was ready for the demands of “put the box by that front door.”

The interview was brief. I walked in. The test aimed to identify one qualification. Was I breathing. Anybody with a pulse got offered the job. My “boss” confirmed I was a living human capable of movement. Could I start tomorrow? The holidays are truly a magical time. [ed. Mr. Story: Indeed- a magical time- with lots of wine AND cheese!]

I waited for my driver with the other driver helpers in a commuter lot for about an hour. It was cold. I made my elementary health teachers proud. I was the only helper waiting for my driver without smoking a cigarette. I worked for three different drivers who expressed their thoughts in words that would not belong in a Christmas special. By the time the holidays ended, I had lasted in a job for which the demands where beyond daunting. Putting the correct packages on the correct doorsteps will go down as one of my signature achievements.

Contrary to what others may say, this is a wine blog. Wine is relevant to the life of a UPS driver helper. When we delivered wine to homes we had to collect a signature. If the residents were not there, we had to leave them a note without dropping off the package. This was not the way to spread holiday cheer. Nothing spoils the holidays more than a paper saying “I brought wine but you were not here so let’s wait 24 more hours.” I did the best I could to bring the wine boxes to the doorstep but if there was nobody there to sign, there was nothing I could do. The Glass Jar is now seeking $550,000 for 3% of his new company, Holiday Winesigners. We hire elves over the age of 21 to sign for your booze over the holidays. Interested? [ed. Mr. Story: I must review the financials while sipping on some wine before I make a commitment to this new endeavor of the Glass Jar.]

BONUS DIGRESSIVE WINE MOMENT: The Field Mouse (known to and knows the Glass Jar) offers wine wisdom from decades of research. “At age 60 I can lay out my list of wines. Riesling from anywhere except California. Rousanne. Dessert wine would be Chenin Blanc from the Loire. Pinot Noir from anywhere except the Loire.. Just about any Italian red.

The acorn does not fall far from the tree. Or should that be “the acorn falls near the tree.” Let’s unpack this then take a deep dive.

Holiday Winesigners. Any Italian red. Genius. Prevent your holiday blues by delivering your holiday booze. Happy New Year everyone!

HELL NO. NOT ON HIS WATCH!!

A Mr Story Christmas Story

‘twas the night before Christmas
And all through the house
Not a creature was stirring
Not even, MAUS!

The barrels were hung
By the chimney with care
In hopes that the WINEMEISTER soon will be there!

The winers were all snuggled up in their beds
While visions of squashed grapes, danced in their heads

We think about Christmas in a different way here at the Best of Wines and today I will be sharing with you my analytical perspective on the holiday and it’s relevance in the wine industry, while suggesting Christmas gifts for your wine lover friends (or family or simply strangers who you must share oxygen with at a holiday party) that will pop their cork off with more excitement and spark than a bottle of champagne on New Year’s eve. So, let’s get to it.

The reality is that the holiday season is basically a large-scale wine exchange. It’s the Shanghai market of wine, if you will. This phenomenon is especially true in the United States where colleagues, friends, and family simply give a bottle of some mysterious wine that they received as a gift in the past. The regifting of wine is quite troubling to me, as I believe that the selection of a wine and then the act of gifting it is very serious and sacred.

The issue is that we as a species have become rather stubborn and set in our ways when it comes to gift giving during the holidays. We have become programmed and don’t think creatively. You see, there are far superior gifts that one can give to a wine lover during the holidays that aren’t wine and may also incorporate some of their other tastes. Here are a few that I ordered on Amazon for the folks on my Excel Spreadsheet Christmas list (Click on the images to buy on Amazon!):

For the Feline Fans:

Funny Gray Kitty Cat Wine Bottle Holder Sculpture for Unique Tabletop Wine Racks & Stands or Feline Statues and Animal Figurines As Holiday Gifts for Pet Owners 

ed tBoW: makes me wanna purrrrr

 

 

For the Classical Music Lovers:

 

Glass Violin Decanter, Mahogany Base – The Wine Savant 1000 ML Glass Decanter For Whiskey, Scotch, Spirits, Wine Or Vodka For Music Lovers.

ed tBoW: can I get this in a Ludwig van B head?

 

For the Intellectual Drinker

Fred WINESTEIN Double-Walled Stemware Mug 

ed tBoW: in my best Spiccoli “hey I know that dude”

 

 

For the Photographer

Neoprene Stemstrap Wine Glass Holder, Black 

ed tBoW: black is my color for 2019!

 

 

Before we close, I must address the elephant in the room and that is the white elephant gift exchanges. These games are quite fun and entertaining and I believe the gifts above would make fantastic white elephant gifts. Also, don’t bring red wine to a white elephant gift exchange. It doesn’t pair well. After all, it is a white elephant gift exchange, so white wine is the more appropriate selection, if you or your spouse insists on bringing wine. Secondly, wrap the gift oddly so that no one can predict that it is a bottle of wine and make it extremely challenging to unwrap. I once wrapped a pair of socks in $60 in pennies and 3 roles of duct tape for a white elephant gift exchange. It certainly provided a good 20 minutes of entertainment during the event for all of the guests to enjoy!

And from tBOW…find Bad Santa on teevee, watch it with a cocktail…and HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!!

Taking Back the “M” Word in 2014

wine futures

wine futures

Hissy fit! Minerality is such an overused term we banned it from the tBoW wine lexicon. Like “it is what it is.” Not on this blog. However, upon consulting with cooler heads and more clear minds the “m” word is back in the game with the caveat that we will only use it to describe wines with high acid and stony character including sulfuric aromatics. High acid and strong citric flavors will not suffice to invoke “minerality.” It’s a new day and we have wines to review.

The Stupid Bore is over. With it the holidays have officially completed. We have a clear pathway to summertime which means Roses and bright summer white wines. It is also means severe drought conditions in California. At least the East and Midwest regions will dry out. Maybe one last crippling character building snowstorm in April. Hope not.

DomaineLA is a somewhat new wine shop on Melrose Avenue in WeHo. They have “more wine and less attitude.” We can say they have wines we are looking for and a highly informed floor person – Courtney – naked-wineWEBwho was able to answer nearly every question we had… about wines. We found the impossible-to-find-on-the-West-Coast Close de la Roillete Vendange Tardive at the shop at a very fair price discounted 10% with overall case purchase. We also found a very decent selection of “natural” wines [ed. new obsession alert!], Burgs and wines from other regions we like including Beaujolais and the Loire. She also had a nice group of Italian wines but not the Sagrantino which Alice Feiring writes about that we were looking for. tBoW also checked at WHWineCo. They have had these unusual wines – specific producers, read the book – but not for several vintages.

The Alice Feiring book “Naked Wine” is exceptionally informative. She covers the original winemakers pushing the “natural” wine movement. She describes their methods and provides a very helpful running discussion of the underlying philosophy and vine to wine values. Feiring is a thorough reporter as well making sure to describe the squishiness of this “movement” and how hard and fast opinions on actions such as using sulfur are actually quite malleable. Still digging it. Here are some wine reviews; not one with minerality.

roty_mars_082008 Roty Marsannay Les Ouzeloy $35: With this bottle and the recent Pataille tasting that featured his Marsannay wines we believe we have a sense of this undervalued and, for us, under-investigated region in the northern Cote d’Or. This wine took 2.5 hours to open. Over that period we saw more action than was taking place on the “most watched TV program ever.” This wine opened masculine and finished that way going from rough and brutish to firm and manageable. This is manly Pinot Noir, sinewy and powerful like the Olympic ice racers [ed. not the “dancers”] we will be watching very soon. Impressive. Roty is a premium producer. Bought from Eno Fine Wine. 13%

deforvill_neb_10WEB2010 De Forville Langhe Nebbiolo $18: Young vine Barbaresco, Rosenthal selection. We had the 2008 version and just purchased the 2011 at DomaineLA. This is a great intro wine to premium Piemonte at a very good price U20 price. Rich and full, middleweight, will take some age to reveal the Piemonte Neb character. We sucked this down after the Marsannay ran out. That helped us through the 4th quarter. We have found older vintages at Liquid Wine. 13.5%

scavino_96WEB1996 Silvio Grasso Barolo Ciabot Manzoni $80: Special meal wine shared by Dotoré. Classic aromas of tar and roses. Meaty yet light on its feet. Boxers – lightweights, welterweights, middleweights – often crowd our consciousness when tasting aged Baroli. This is a Carlos Monzon [ed. Argentine 70s] bottle. Exotic, hitting power, elegance. The wine kept its power and finesse for the entire evening. 14%

nav_gewurtz_2001WEB2001 Navarro Gewurtztraminer Late Harvest Cluster Select $24: Picked off the shelf at Liquid. It is always somewhat of a risk when payng for a dessert wine in a split from a producer not known for such. Weighing in favor of the buy was that Navarro is a very consistent winery and Gewurtz is one of their staple white wines. But could it last 12 years? Poured out dark brown and clear. Looked like root beer without the fizz. The flavors were completely exotic: caramel, coffee and cola. All in harmony and so tasty. A perfect dessert wine for the fresh Meyer lemon possit pudding it accompanied. Spectacular. 10%

The image at top was taken in our local Target [ed. “tar-zjay”] store. The marketing genius displayed… Think about Colonel Kurtz explaining to Capt Willard how… never mind. Will the next generation of these Modern House Wines labels will include “minerality mania” and “natural wonder.” I kid you not: Oprah Favorite.

Recommended reply to the use of “it is what it is”: fuzzy wuzzy was a bear. Try it. Fun.

On the topic of boxers…here is the commentary from the end of the 12th round from the 1962 Emile Griffith vs Benny Paret fight which Griffith won by knockout. Paret never got up. Televised boxing was suspended for a decade. Supposedly Paret had called Griffith “maricon” at the weigh in.